Elon Musk Takes Twitter By Storm With His Witty And Hilarious Tweets

By Aileen Dometita

Elon Musk is our real-life Tony Stark. Whereas Stark creates suits to fight the bad guys, Musk creates rocket ships and vehicles to change the world and help humanity. It’s estimated that his IQ is 155. He’s basically a genius with that level of brain processing. But what separates him from other geniuses is his level of focus, his intensity! You’ve seen him on the Joe Rogan Experience, declaring the bankruptcy of his company: Tesla Motors, and naming his child after artificial intelligence with his artistic girlfriend Grimes. His quirky behavior and hilarious tweets are grazing the internet and we’re living for his dad jokes. Can’t seem to get enough of him? We can’t either. Just how in the world, did this man become a billionaire?

All images in this article are courtesy of @elonmusk on Twitter.

Ice Cream

The SpaceX CEO has posted that he loves Twitter, and these posts explain why. Elon has preached the topic of a favorite treat: ice cream! It’s a refreshing diversion to physics and engineering. So while we’re at it, imagine that scoop of cream melting in your mouth. What’s its flavor? Why, it’s wooden, of course.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

But really, surely those spoons add to the flavor of the ice cream. You can play the doctor in between bites and melts. And that handle just takes you back to preschool. Plus, they’re a better alternative to using plastic spoons. Metals are the worst. They’ll numb your tongue to the taste of the dessert. Now, we wouldn’t want that!

Weekends Off

There seems to be a little Elon Musk in all of us. In an unfiltered tweet, the CEO shared this tidbit about how he sets the mood for a night off. Yes, there’s music. There’s aged wine, red and chilled to perfection. And then there’s a little hint of spice that makes everything nice.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

His next magic trick will be a disappearing act. Watch this isolated outburst poof into thin air after one, two, three! As Elon Musk puts it, music is a limbic resonator. But we’re going to add a little Ambien for maximum therapeutic effect. Some essential oils for our humidifier and bam! Time for lift off.

Ninja, Not Samurai

Ashlee Vance authored a book about Musk, and claimed that he had told an investor, “My mentality is that of a samurai. I would rather commit seppuku than fail.” But Musk has taken to Twitter to deny he ever said such a thing. He does, however, tell us to delay gratification, or in other words to…

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Wield it. Bear the cuts and slices. Face the possibility of being harmed and choose to suffer the pain of discipline than the pain of regret. Time will pass. But how you spend it will determine how easily you achieve your goals. Will you shelve the pain? Or will you face it in the likelihood that you’ll grow accustomed to it in time?

On Having An Insane Work Ethic

Elon made headlines when asked how many hours a person should devote to work. But the fact of the matter is that he had been very passionate about the effort he put in his start-ups and projects. Remember the Zip2 project? His peers had admitted they would work for 20 hours, whereas Elon would work for 23! So it’s really no wonder why he said this.

Source: @margrethmpossi/Twitter

That’s roughly 11 hours per day. Add about 7 hours of sleep for optimal brain functioning. You’d only have five hours for making meals, transport, or leisure. But it has worked for Elon, so who are we to judge? He owns this work ethic because you’d be able to accomplish in half a year what others would finish in 12 months. Would you work this much?

Rollin’ With The Haters

He doesn’t take too kindly to people questioning his company’s advancements. Some had thought that these were staged, a dupe for the rest of the world in believing that they were planting satellites in space. Guess, we grew up believing that the only way to use a rocket ship was to use it once.

Source: @Sc00bs/Twitter

We can feel the sting. Weren’t there people who watched the live launch of Space X’s Falcon Heavy Rocket, and the landing of all three rockets? That should be proof enough. This is Elon Musk everybody, he’s responsible for the moon landings! We kid.

Safety And Compatibility

When browsing a car’s functions, you’d check the maximum speed, mileage, battery capacity, and so on. But Tesla Model 3 goes beyond ensuring the passengers’ safety. It ensures they’re kept company throughout the ride. So the next time you go window shopping ask yourself: how compatible am I with this car?

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Go right ahead, hop in. It has a seating capacity of five adults, but just in case you’re solo-traveling, the car will keep you up to speed on most of Apple’s negative news. Neither will you have to worry about social distancing from the other cars. Its 12 ultrasonic sensors and eight optical cameras guarantee full self-driving capabilities.

Supreme Leader

If you thought that Elon wanted to colonize Mars as a Plan B for Earth’s climate meltdown, you’re mistaken. He wants it as a Plan B in case Artificial Intelligence takes over Earth. Despite being a staunch supporter of AI, he has admitted his fears in this tweet. But no, really.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Elon has had debates with his Silicon Valley buddies that “with artificial intelligence, we are summoning the demon. At least when there’s an evil dictator, that human is going to die. But for an AI, there would be no death. It would live forever. And then you’d have an immortal dictator from which we can never escape.” Hence the travel to Mars. Does it remind you of The Matrix? Is Mars going to be the Desert of the Real?

No Material Attachments

Musk made headlines thrice. The first time around, when people found out he and Grimes had been tweeting each other. *wink wink* The second time around was when Grimes published a nude picture of herself with a visible baby bump. And the third time was when Musk declared material non-attachment.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Well, it’s not like they’re married, but finding out your baby daddy is going to sell his house should be the least of your worries when you’re nearing the due date. That’s a justified reason to blow off some steam. Where is the kid going to live, for goodness’ sake? In a Cybertruck?

Easing Off the Pedal

When Elon took to Twitter, some people found his candidness entertaining, whereas, others disapproved of it. This is, after all, the CEO of SpaceX and Tesla. Shouldn’t high-ranking executives be filtering their messages? Positivity and purpose. Isn’t that somewhere in the mission statement?

Source: @lrroberts87/Twitter

And it’s good that Elon Musk gave his two thumbs up to the suggestion. There have been times when he would call out someone an idiot for expressing a worldview different from his. Since 2018, his tweets have still been a mixture of the good and the bad. It makes for a thrilling ride.

Preach, Daddy!

If there’s something Elon mastered at an early age, it’s computer programming. He had created Blastar at the age of 12 and sold it for $500 to PC and Office Technology Magazine. Given his years of mileage, we trust that Daddy Elon can give us some advice about life.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Sounds about true. Doesn’t that comfort you? All this time, we had thought we were going around in circles. Now, someone successful had finally allayed us by saying it’s meant to be that way. Enlightenment is a long and winding process.

Light Reading

Remember what Einstein said about our reactions? Weak people avenge themselves. Smart people ignore, but geniuses engage in the conversation. No judgments really, take a look for yourself. How would you have reacted? Because we find ourselves still chortling long after reading this.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

It turns out we’ve been wrong about the alien this whole time. It had been Armstrong all along. And what Elon had said about non-existent coincidences should have proved that the few supporters of bottled water and its distribution were, and still are, naive.

Life Without Him

Justine has perfectly encaptured Elon in that Quora answer. He’s too compelling and unique to be replaced, or be clubbed into oblivion by anyone. And he has a competitive advantage because he is a master of so many sciences, that he can speak the language of each and connect the tribes. What would our life be without him?

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Really, he has become our Baby Yoda. He and his Silicon Valley friends contribute to the balance of the force. We have gone on living without purpose. Which begs the question, is AI our Anakin Skywalker? We guess only time can truly tell.

Why He Stays Out of Touch

After coming home from work, would you take some time off to relax, or do you turn on the telly? If it’s the latter, would you even dare to watch the local news? Probably not. Musk stays out of touch with the real world, for the same reason.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

You’re dog-beat tired. You don’t need someone reminding you why you should give up on serving others. Most of the things we read about on the paper are things beyond our control. So we focus on things that are within ours. We focus on solutions, much like Elon does. Keep at it!

Joke’s On You

It pays to know the date. On April Fools Day, Elon built up anticipation on a mysterious tweet. Important news would be released in a few hours. That alone would have made us wary. He made a statement that rocked the internet. He dropped a massive bomb on Twitter, saying…

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

And that would have had our knees buckling, had it not been for the date. He had been found passed out against a Tesla Model 3 car with a disarray of “teslaquilla” bottles. He posts an image of his face to the side, with eyes closed and salted tears lining his cheeks. Cute!

Unsafe For Work

You are not required to watch it. But if you do, good luck stifling a laugh! This is another dad showing off serious no-care dance moves at a company event. Elon had flown into Shanghai to promote and offer the Tesla Model 3 to Chinese customers when he did the mummy. Someone entomb him!

Source: @CNN/Twitter

He did say he was weird. We wished we hadn’t watched this. Now the cranky CEO known for his you’re-hot-and-you’re-cold outbursts has endeared us. We can’t wait for him to hold tech shows and company events if only to see his dance moves in person. Work it, Tony Stark.

Defining Creativity

What makes a genius? In simple terms, novel association. They’re able to integrate pieces of information no one has before. Take Einstein integrated the concept that a flame needs oxygen to continue combusting. Remove oxygen from a bulb by cutting off its source, and you’ll have an incandescent light.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Elon understands this concept all too well. That’s why he was able to integrate entrepreneurship, computer programming, and automotive technology in building state-of-the-art cars and rocket ships. This is all in the name of efficiency and sustainability. Food for thought, for sure.

Friendly Competition

Owing to Apple’s decision to craft its own electric car project, Elon issued a statement that intrigued the public: “They have hired people we’ve fired. We always jokingly call Apple the ‘Tesla Graveyard’. If you don’t make it at Tesla, you go work at Apple. I’m not kidding.” Afterwards, Elon apologized …well, kinda.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

He wasn’t even pissed that Apple was recruiting his ex-employees. He doesn’t care about them spilling company secrets. If they weren’t good enough to solve them in the first place, chances are they wouldn’t be able to contribute much. Elon seems to be the new Steve Jobs, see the similarities?

Cyberwhat?

Cybertruck: it’s the latest ride that promises a 6.5-foot cargo bed with 6-passenger seat capacity. If you order a single-motor version, it has an estimated driving range of 250 miles. Going full speed quickly? Rev the engine up in 6.5 seconds and you’ll be speeding from zero to 60 mph. Plus it can tow nearly 7000 kg of weight. Can’t imagine, look below!

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Its exterior body is kind of like Black Panther’s suit. It’s nearly indestructible, being armor glass; the same component used in SpaceX’s rocket ships. And if you throw a moving object at it, it will hurl it back at you by absorbing and redirecting impact at the source.

Hot Dang!

Its specs are so impressive that it didn’t need advertising or paid endorsements to entice customers. Within a couple of days, people placed orders swiftly. And we would have too, if we had the finances to spare. This truck is poised to be the iPhone of the car industry.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

And those stats were late last year. Imagine how well they must be doing now. Models will be available by 2022, and we can’t wait until then. You could tow a camper van with this truck. Place an ATV in the back compartment and go trekking whenever you want.

Music Lover

If you haven’t known yet, Elon’s girlfriend is a musician. Her real name is Claire Elise Boucher and her genre of music is mostly electronic music. Our favorite tracks include “Oblivion”, “Kill V. Maim”, and “Genesis”. Expect them to be otherworldly, mildly disturbing, and erotic. Being a musician, we expect her to perform in music fests. So we’re wondering how she reacted to Elon’s eye-raising tweet.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Elon dissed Coachella for rescheduling its gigs due to the COVID-19. Coachella shut him down by posting a pic of Jaden Smith atop a Tesla car held by cable wires during the 2019 set. Elon abashedly replied: Ok fine, that was good haha.

Elven Names And Aircrafts

Everyone was abuzz with the newborn’s name. We couldn’t even pronounce it. Could you? Even Gwyneth Paltrow took to Twitter to tell her ex-husband Chris that they got beat for most controversial baby name. To explain the characters, Grime had to tweet.

Source: @Grimezsz/Twitter

Unfortunately, she had made a typo error on the precursor to their favorite aircraft. Elon wasted no time correcting her with the curt and sassy two-word reply. We’re sensing a pattern. Do you? Try checking out his Twitter wall some time.

Dissing Apple

Marked as its top-secret project, Apple’s electric car is set to hit the stores by 2020. Steve Zadesky is leading the project design and construction. Unfortunately, this was moved indefinitely to 2021. Elon wasted no time in lobbing a Molotov cocktail.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Well, you have to hand it to him. It’s brutally funny! And the engine is near the total amount of the car. You’d still have to buy overpriced accessories, exclusively manufactured by the Apple company. And we’re guessing the car can only go for a certain mileage like they do with storage capacity. If you want it to go beyond that, you’ll have to buy a recent model.

Forgive Her

Reeling from labor pains and the hormonal fluctuation, Grimes explained that it had been merely a typographical error. It’s not like she didn’t know, so Elon had better consult her next time. It’s not like we judged her or anything, so Baby Momma should take the time to rest.

Source: @Grimezsz/Twitter

And this time, Elon took note. He had replied U r a powerful woman fairy princess (in emojis). But people are still confused with the name’s pronunciation. Even the couple have taken to different ways of saying it. Plus, California state laws dictate they only use the 26 letters of the alphabet. Technically, their child has no official name yet.

Hellbent On Becoming Aliens

Rumors have circulated that Elon is actually an alien. He has denied them. But assuming those were true, he’s really just finding a way back home. He dreams of inhabiting Mars in the next 20 years with over 1,000 starships. Would you be taking a lunge to the red planet?

Source: @SciGuySpace/Twitter

We have to strategically launch a flight to Mars every two years because that’s the only time Earth has a planetary alignment with it. To ship the infrastructure needed to build a local city, it would take nearly a decade. NASA plans to send a crewed flight to Mars by 2024, while Elon ambitiously plans to do it by 2022. Well, Cybertrucks will be used then.

Being A Dad

In case you’re wondering, Elon has 6 living children. He has triplets and twins with his first wife, Justine Musk, and another son with present girlfriend Grimes. So fatherhood isn’t really new to the billionaire. Twitter followers were expectant about the youngest child though, and they had tweeted Elon to post a picture of him.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Elon complied the sassiest way he could: make him a punk as early as possible. But don’t you worry, those are just filters and add-ons. It’s uncanny for a shy man to be duping us this way, but it seems that he lets on more than we’ll ever know.

For Rebuttal

There’s really nothing that we can do to negate the presence of AI when there’s a primitive version of it all around us. But why aren’t we disturbed by it? If you have watched The Matrix, The Terminator, and Avengers: Age of Ultron, you’d be taking this debate seriously. We’re setting 10 minutes for the opposition leader, Elon.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

And he wins it in less than two seconds. That’s a major point right there. We can rely on glitches, buffers and OS failures to keep Skynet from becoming an “immortal dictator”. Every now and then, humanity would have 14 seconds to rule. Ducking hit backspace and re-type properly.

POVs

Just to add to the suspenseful drama, Elon posed this question. To be frank, we can’t even believe it’s a verified group. How many days did it take for them to achieve that blue check mark? If Twitter took them seriously, we’re constrained to do so too!

Source: @FlatEarthOrg/Twitter

So if we travel to Mars, should the first crew consist of flat-earthers? Have them prove, or disprove, the claim that the Earth is 2-D. Maybe then, they’ll start believing what Eratosthenes had computed 2.000 years ago — the Earth’s circumference as an obloid object. At least, if things go haywire, we’d be checking flat-earthers off the list.

He’s Weird!

It really shouldn’t come as a surprise that Elon is more than a bit peculiar. Pioneers have one thing in common: they are the way they are because they think outside the box. At a time when the computer was just growing in popularity, he had thought of an internet version of the yellow pages with a telephone directory and maps. That’s the Zip2, which you’d now know as Paypal.

Source: @paracurve/Twitter

That made him a multi-millionaire in his late twenties. But was he always considered by peers to be destined for greatness? No; his teachers and classmates state that he wasn’t even amongst the four brightest kids in his class. He was described as a “likable, quiet, unspectacular student”. Would you blame him for taking it easy? Weird people are often bullied.

No Mercy Shown

At the start of the year, Tesla acquired Maxwell, a battery technology company. Elon said that Tesla is looking into dry electrode technology for use in the performance of the futuristic Cybertruck. Unfortunately, the word did not reach Apple nor the millions of people awaiting news about the merger.

Source: @MrRobRobson/Twitter

Shots fired! And this is why Elon has frequently lambasted Apple and its services. Were you able to stay in on the loop regarding the merger? What news app were you using? Apple should do something to up their game in the industry. They’re not faring as well as they used to.

Sharing the Credit

CEO Elon was all smiles when the Model 3 performed superbly on an EPA rating confirmation tests. What does that mean for us? The car was run through a machine much like a treadmill. Its stats were monitored on the simulated track it ran across, either city driving or interstate freeway driving. It performed well on both.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

Basically, this car will get you farther than its competition, on a single charge. That’s 310 miles for city driving and 350 miles for long range freeway driving. Remember that Tesla cars are reliant on electric charge than on gas. Have you considered buying one? We’re seriously giving it some thought.

All In A Day’s Work

And that is why Elon has his people working 11-hour shifts minimum every day. He wants to make progress this lifetime. He’d be 68 by then. Chop, chop, everyone! The fate of the world rests on you guys. Minor roadblock? Just speed ahead; use the Cybertruck if need be.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

They have been achieving milestones in a shorter amount of time than they had planned. If that’s possible, then so is that habitable city on Mars by 2040. Imagine that; we’d actually make it to inter-planet travel this century. We thought the only space travel we could experience was at the theatre house. Exciting!

Applicability

In an online query, Justine Musk stated that in order to be a billionaire you need the potential to offer something so unique and compelling and helpful that…no one could outsource you, no one could steal your product and make it better. Be a master of two things, or more, and bring them together in a way that would introduce hot ideas to each other — like automotive technology and space navigation.

Source: @elonmusk/Twitter

And that is why, ladies and gentlemen, having a vast amount of knowledge in more than one area can allow you to spark fresh creative insight. That is how Elon Musk is changing the world one field at a time. Soon enough, it’ll be one cosmic body after another.